He passed out. On my thigh. On our way to Countryside Mall.
He passed out. Again. On my thigh. Again. On our way to Countryside Mall. Again.
How can someone so tiny take up so much space?! His side was COMPLETELY VACANT. Yet... He's sleeping on my side, causing me to hang off the bed. HOW?!
And who sleeps like THIS?! His body is straight, but his neck looks like it was just broken.
Playing with a Hermit Crab, at "John's Pass Village".
I miss my Hermit Crabs.
Lord, have mercy!
I snatched myself a DAMN FINE looking man.
So how does someone like me end up with someone like him...??
Because I'm 100% positive I have the most handsome AND best dressed boyfriend. Ever.
After I dyed his hair black for him.
So handsome.
All mine.
Still all mine.
Shirtless? Mmmm!!
Shirtless AGAIN?! Double Mmmm!!
His last night here. Packing... </3
Looking super cute in his new reading glasses.
On our way to the airport... </3
I didn't want him to go... </3
Someone once told me that men "settle" with fat women, because they don't think they can do better. And that men don't REALLY want to be with fat women.
I'm fat. I'm 5'4" and 291 lbs.
But my boyfriend is madly in love with me. He treats me like a Goddess. He always reminds me how much I mean to him. He's gentle with my heart. He's careful with his actions and words.
And he's NEVER once made me feel like I wasn't good enough to be with him. He's NEVER once made me feel unloved.
The entire time he was here, he couldn't keep his hands off me. He kept telling me how much he loved my body.
My boyfriend is young, intelligent, mature, sweet, kind, caring, loving, affectionate, polite, respectful, funny, charismatic, and extremely handsome. If he wanted someone thinner, younger, prettier, OR closer... He could easily do it.
But instead, he chose to be with me.
We fell in love so quickly. Within a couple of days, we both admitted to loving each other. And a couple of days after that, we both admitted to being IN LOVE with each other. Less than a week after meeting. And some people might think we moved too fast. But it's really none of their business. We fell in love. We went on video call NEARLY every night. And then he came to see me. And we fell in love even more. His entire visit was... Magical...
I've had the worst luck with men. I've only had 3 prior relationships. And they've all been... Terrible. The first time was back when I was 17. It lasted 1-month. We saw each other a lot. He used me to make an ex-girlfriend jealous. It worked. He broke up with me in the cruelest way: He did it through a phone call, listing EVERYTHING that was wrong with me. The second time was back when I was 18. It only lasted 1-week. When we were together, he gave me his old military dog tags. The last time I saw him, he asked for his military dog tags back. He claimed that he gave me the wrong ones. I knew what it meant, though. I've never been completely stupid. I didn't say anything, though. I just very quietly took the necklace off and gave them back. The last time was from the time I was 20 until the time I was 24. Over 4-years of being psychologically abused. Being told that no one else would ever love me, and no one else would ever want to be with me. I started to believe it. It sucked to be so depressed that I had ZERO self-esteem. And after we broke up, he told me that someone covered in scars is never going to find a decent guy, because all the decent guys will think I'm "mentally compromised", for self-harming. And then people that I never got into a relationship with... They just used me for their own sexual purposes. I was an easy target.
And he hasn't seemed to have the best luck with relationships, either. He's only been in 2 prior relationships. The first time was back when he was 16. It lasted 2-weeks. She broke up with him, because he wasn't Christian enough for her. They hung out before they started dating. But throughout the entire relationship, they never hung out. The second time was back when he was 18. It lasted 1-month. They hung out twice, throughout the entire relationship. The first time was at the cinema. The second time was on Valentine's Day. He bought her a teddy bear and flowers. She broke up with him, claiming that he was trying to buy her love. And he had only sex ONCE. Not with either girls he dated, though. It was back when he was 15. They used a condom. He never "finished", though. And neither did she, apparently.
He was pretty innocent, to be honest. He had sex once, yeah. But they used a condom, neither one of them "finished", he never went down on her, he never fingered her, she never jerked him off, she never gave him a blowjob, they never cuddled, and they never tongue kissed.
In fact... He never did that stuff with ANY girl. Until he visited me. Then I kind of corrupted him, because we did EVERYTHING. We tongue kissed, he fingered me, he went down on me, I jerked him off, I gave him a blowjob, we made love, we cuddled, we both had orgasms... EVERYTHING. AND we didn't use a condom. Thank you, Depo-Provera birth control shot! He's NEVER done those things. He had sex before, yeah. And so did I. But I was the first person he made love to. And he was the first person that made love to me. And he was the first person to finger me and go down on me. And we BOTH had our first orgasm, together. Which felt INCREDIBLE. Plus, I LOVED not using a condom. He felt AMAZING.
And we both keep talking about getting married and having a family. One day. Not now.
This isn't a man that is "settling" with me; This is a man that is "settling down" with me. A man that wants to spend his life with me, despite him only being 20. He knows what he wants. And what he wants is me. And that's perfect for me, because what I want is him. Forever & Always.
And I'm SO HAPPY to FINALLY have a MAN in my life. And not some little boy that can't make up his mind. I'm SO HAPPY to have a decent man, for once in my life. And I'm NEVER letting this man go.
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